The season is over! This competition in Slovenia marked the end of the international Lead season.
Unfortunately, it ended with a dissapointment for me.

On Saturday 14 November I topped my first qualification route. In the second one my heel slipped off a hold without friction. I was on a provisional 11th spot, enough for the semifinal later that evening.
After a little break in our appartment, my mother and I returned to the isolation zone for the next round. I knew I had put way too much pressure on myself during the qualifications, so before the start of the semifinal I decided to stop being fearful. I wanted to trust instead.

The first move of the women’s semifinal route scared many of us; it was a little jump. It couldn’t be extremely difficult, but surely it was risky enough to make you fall. This happened to Tjasa Kalan from Slovenia. I still don’t know the reason why routesetters set such traps…
I was relieved when I stuck this first move and while climbing I felt that the rest of the route was quite weird too. But since I had decided not to give up I tried to keep going even though the moves were strange. I finally ended up on a provisional 3rd place. I felt tired after such a long day, but very thankful for a good climb.

The next evening all finalists met again in the isolation for the last worldcup final of the year.
During my climb I had some difficulty with one of the first quickdraws. I finally managed to clip it from a higher position. Since this had cost me some power, I tried to recover in the middle of the route. When I reached the end of the overhang I wasn’t too tired and I wanted to climb on to the last vertical part of the wall.
I reached for a big yellow hold and realized that it was worse than I had expected. I replaced my feet and made a toehook with my right foot. Then I went for the next hold… and fell.
Maybe the toehook had prevented me from grabbing the hold high enough. I wasn’t sure. But anyway, it was a dissapointing way to end the season.
Thankfully, I was able to have peace with the situation despite the grief I felt.

Kranj 2015 (Flickr IFSC)

There have been very painful moments this season. I’ve had to cry several times, thinking of the weeks and months of preparation and of ‘what could have been possible’. But I know these kinds of moments shape a person’s character. I believe nothing in my life happens by chance.
As a human, I cannot look further than the present. But the Almighty God can. Only He knows what the future will bring. When I loose control, He is always in control. That is why I can trust Him. Even in the hard times. Even in the questions.

I’d like to thank my parents, friends, members of the club in Puurs and others who supported me throughout the season. And of course I want to thank my Savior, Jesus Christ.